It’s uncomfortable, but it’s a conversation both parties know must take place. As practice begins, Bill Walton, the John Stark wrestling coach, pulls Morgan Belanger aside.

“You know if anything inappropriate happens, you have to tell me,” he says. Belanger nods. She’s had this talk before. “I mean anything,” he continues. “If a guy touches you the wrong way, or a grab turns into a grope, I need to know about it.”

“No problem, coach,” she replies. Thus far, she’s been right.

In the 10 years since Walton started the wrestling team at John Stark, he said an issue has yet to be brought to his attention concerning any of the eight female grapplers he’s supervised. But he knows it takes only one brazen adolescent male to put the program in a very tough spot.

So the awkward conversations continue.

Look past the potential issues associated with high school co-eds wrestling on a mat, however, and Walton said there are some very talented female athletes holding their own against testosterone-laden counterparts – and that holds true in other traditionally male-dominated sports as well.

From the gridiron to the baseball diamond, the wrestling mat to the hockey rink, and on every surface in between, these girls are proving they can play with and beat the boys.

The challenge
Marc Noel knows a thing or two about female athletes. The Pembroke Academy boys hockey coach has also mentored the Lady Monarchs the past 10 seasons.

He’s sent eight females to play college hockey. His 20-yearold daughter, Stephanie, played for the Concord girls club program while attending Bishop Brady, and she’s now enrolled at Rochester Institute of Technology, where she played hockey her freshman season.

Noel’s Spartans currently feature two female players, forwards Jennifer Poulin and Alyssa Caruso.

Poulin, said Noel, is an impact player who will compete at the college level. She tallied seven goals and 12 assists during the 2007-08 season, her junior campaign.

“Jen’s a big girl that puts the puck in the net,” said Noel. “She’s been playing boys sports ever since she was little, so it’s the only thing she knows.”

Kaira Ellis understands that concept well.

Ellis began playing ice hockey when she was 4 and grew up competing with boys in the Concord Youth Hockey League and for the New Hampshire Selects.

As a goaltender for the Pembroke Academy girls hockey team, Ellis said she had to earn the respect of her teammates.

Now an assistant coach for the Spartans – after playing three years for the Saint Anselm College women’s team – she said she once again had to earn the players’ esteem. Yet she doesn’t believe it’s a male/ female thing.

When she stepped onto the ice as a high school freshman, she, like any other newcomer, had to prove herself. As a coach, her players needed to understand she knew what she was talking about before they would listen to her.

Ellis knows full well, however, that’s not the case at all schools. She’s thankful for the consideration the Pembroke players have shown her through the years.

Of course, that doesn’t mean they’ve walked on egg shells either. As a four-year starter in net at Pembroke, Ellis shared the same locker room with her male counterparts. All parties went into separate stalls to change and respected each other’s privacy, but she shared in the same off-color jokes typical of sports locker rooms throughout the country.

Ellis was just one of the guys, and she wouldn’t have it any other way.

“I went from playing boys high school hockey to girls hockey in college, and the boys game is a lot faster,” she said. “You have to be mentally prepared.” It’s more than just being prepared that allows females to compete with males, said Noel. It’s a state of mind, a desire to excel when others tell them they shouldn’t be there.

Belanger said she struggled as a 77-pound freshman grappler and only found success when Walton taught her to enter a match believing she had just as much chance to win as her male foe. This year, as a senior in the 112-pound weight class, Belanger finished in the top four at the Class I wrestling championship and earned a berth at the Meet of Champions.

To Walton’s knowledge, one other female reached the Meet of Champions, and only Belanger walked away with a victory at the event.

The past four years, Belanger said she’s always been outmuscled, but has learned to use her speed and flexibility to gain a winning edge.

She’s also discussed her teammates’ mentality when they enter matches with females. Walton said he’s seen a male wrestler’s psyche totally destroyed by losing to a female.

Belanger learned to take advantage of any opponent’s apprehension. “I tried to get into their head and make them feel like they didn’t want to touch me, let alone wrestle me alone on the mat,” she said, adding she wishes other females would have the courage to wrestle. “It’s really not that scary. It’s actually a pretty fun sport once you get out there and learn to enjoy it.”

Getting physical
“Wrestling is a contact sport, and it’s not just football contact, it’s close-knit contact with no pads and no real barrier,” said Walton. “I always talk to the girls about the fact there is grabbing, and you’re going to have opponents grab legs and grab arms.

But it’s the other areas they might try to grab, or grope, that concern me.”

In turn, Walton said he advises his male competitors that expediency is key when facing a female. “I tell the guys to try to pin them as quickly as possible – nothing good can come of spending too much time on the mat,” he said. “You don’t want to go out there and embarrass the girl or belittle her either. You want to respect her like any other opponent.”

It’s not the sanctioned match, where refs, coaches, parents and fellow wrestlers are all watching closely, that gives Walton anxiety. It’s the practice room.

“I can’t see any guy ever trying to do something in an environment that they are being so closely scrutinized, but at practice, I can’t be watching everyone all the time … I always like having two girls because they can (practice) and work out together. It’s less looking out of the corner of my eyes for me.

“Thankfully, no issue has come up,” added Walton. “It’s tough enough trying to explain and get people to understand all the hard work and time that goes into wrestling, let alone having to go to the school board or administration and trying to explain something like that happening.”

That doesn’t mean it’s never happened.

Belanger said the one time she thought an opposing male wrestler took advantage of the situation, she went to her teammates.

They spoke to the offending opponent, explained it was inappropriate and warned him to avoid repeating his mistake. It wasn’t a problem again.

Ice hockey’s environment is different.

“(Girls) play a physical game against each other. There’s no checking, but they bump each other, and it gets a little nasty sometimes,” said Noel. “But when the girls play with the guys, they’ve got to be able to take (hard checks), there’s no doubt about it. Jen (Poulin) has been checked over and over again. She takes her lumps and bumps, but she keeps coming right back at them.”

It’s the hard checks, however, that keep some girls away from the sport, said Tom Ackerson, coach of the Concord High School girls hockey team, state runner-up in the inaugural year of the New Hampshire girls varsity hockey division.

“(Hockey) is physical for both girls or boys … There’s no checking in girls hockey, but players still get knocked around, it’s just not as ‘goony’ as it is on the boys’ side,” said Ackerson. “They’re not going out there trying to hurt each other.”

“Jen (Poulin) started getting a lot of grief (for being a girl), so when the boys were picking on her, she beat them up, and they left her alone,” said Noel.

Harassment
Lighthearted banter and roughhousing aside, many female athletes deal with both verbal and physical harassment that is sexual in nature.

Former University of Colorado placekicker Katie Hnida absorbed abuse in every form during her two years with the NCAA Division-I squad. According to a Feb. 23, 2004 article by Rick Reilly in Sports Illustrated, Hnida said teammates groped her, called her vulgar names, threw footballs at her head and worse. She also said she was raped by a teammate she considered a friend.

She dropped out following her sophomore year and, according to the story, was depressed for two years, suffered insomnia and gave up kicking.

But Hnida rebounded. In 2002, three years after the alleged rape, she walked on at New Mexico. In August 2003, she became the first female to score in a Division I game when she notched two extra-point kicks in a 72-8 win over Texas State-San Marcos.

A league of their own?
Not for everyone
Hannah Paitchel could be playing softball with other girls her age. Instead, the 11-year-old is striking out boys on the Pelham Little League diamond.

Paitchel, who has two older brothers, has played baseball since she learned to walk, said her father, Steve.

League all-star season, Paitchel was not only the lone female to compete, but she was one of three 10-year-olds to play on Pelham’s 11-year-old all-star squad. In fact, Steve Paitchel said two other girls Hannah’s age joined the Little League this year.

“I think she’s led by example by giving them the comfort to play the sport they love without having to feel uncomfortable about it,” he said.

Hannah also excels playing flag football with the boys, said her father. She accounted for 30 of her team’s 35 touchdowns last year.

“In all fairness, the best boy athletes are actually playing real football, so the competition level is a little watered down,” said the elder Paitchel. “But that just makes her accomplishments in baseball that much more impressive because the competition isn’t watered down, and she’s dominating.”

While the New Hampshire Interscholastic Athletic Association restricts female athletes from playing male sports when an equivalent female-only option is available, R. Patrick Corbin, executive director of the NHIAA, said that rule does not apply to baseball because the sports have sufficient differences. Still, Corbin defended the restrictive policy because he said it promotes female athletics.

“We haven’t determined what to do yet because we don’t know where (Hannah) will be when she is 13, so we always said we would re-evaluate at that point,” said Steve Paitchel. “If she continues to be as dominating on the pitching mound as she is now, I think it would just be wrong to make her stop.”

Corbin added the NHIAA discourages females from playing baseball because, when freshmen and sophomores become upperclassmen, the playing field, in general, heavily favors male athletes.

“I’m going to try to play baseball as long as I can,” said Hannah. “And if I can’t, then I’m going to switch to softball, which I think will be a lot easier.”

Ellis said the formation of the NHIAA’s all-girl hockey division restrains female hockey players.

“For any girl that has the talent to play on a boys hockey team, it’s a great opportunity for them, and they should take it because when they get into college they have to play with the girls,” said Ellis. “If you take Jen (Poulin), for example, you put her on a girls team without the numbers and the depth, and it’s not as beneficial to her. It’s tough for me to endorse taking that away from the girls who have a lot of potential and are playing first or second line on a boys team.”

Ellis said that’s proof enough girls shouldn’t be restricted from playing where they’re most comfortable.

Still, Ackerson said female hockey has its place.

“I think if you have a girls team it allows more girls to play,” he said. “There are very few that can compete at the boys level. I’ve watched some girls play for some of the local (boys) teams in this area, and I’m not sure if they get to excel at the rate they would like to.”

Walton said he’s excited to see the creation of the girls hockey division because it signifies forward thinking by the NHIAA.

“Right now, we’re drawing more females into those perceived male sports and, who knows, maybe eventually we’ll have female wrestling in New Hampshire,” said the John Stark wrestling coach. “I know California has female wrestling, and the Olympics have female wrestling.

Unfortunately for New Hampshire, I think we’re still a long way away from that.”