BY ROD HANSEN

In a world where  family members, friends or neighbors can also be predators, fear often serves as a defense mechanism for children.

That was one of the messages delivered by Kim Fillmore, a victim’s advocate with the Hillsborough County Attorney’s office, at a recent presentation on self-defense and awareness at Goffstown High School.

Appearing before a group of about a dozen local parents, Fillmore offered the presentation similar to the one she gives to eighth-grade health students at McKelvie Middle School in Bedford.

Much of Fillmore’s discussion centered on training youngsters to trust their instincts, even if it means rejecting a family member’s affections.

“Every time we tell children to do something they don’t want to do, we’re telling them to ignore their gut instincts,” Fillmore said.

While she’s currently handling 80 cases of assault, Fillmore said less than 10 of those involve a person being atttacked by a stranger.

“It doesn’t usually happen that someone gets attacked by a stranger who jumps out from behind a bush,” she said.

With more than 20 years’ experience as a victims advocate, Fillmore said she has handled thousands of cases involving child predators. She used some of those case histories to inspire discussion during her presentation.

In one of those examples, an adult male assaulted a 14-year-old neighbor after the man invited two local boys to spend the night at his house. The man gave the boys alcohol to facilitate the assault, Fillmore said.

“What parent of sound mind would allow their teenage boys to sleep over at a grown man’s house where there are no other kids their age?” one audience member asked.

Fillmore said the case illustrates how parents can sometimes be lulled into trusting a predator. The youths had done several odd jobs with the man previously, and had also slept over at his house in the past.

“Plus, he was a really nice guy,” Fillmore said, adding that the situation of an adult male preying on juvenile boys makes it difficult for the victims to testify.

“There’s a real stigma in our society about boys and male offenders,” she said.

Fillmore encouraged audience members to further research the subject of sexual assault through the New Hampshire Coalition Against Domestic and Sexual Violence at www.nhcadsv.org. 

Fillmore’s speech opened an evening which also included a presentation from police officers David Rivard and Elyse Regan on women’s self-protection and awareness against domestic and sexual violence.

Rivard and Regan offered advice on how women can protect themselves against assault and what to do if such a case occurs.

Females should be aware of date rape drugs such as Rohypnol and Ketamine, and should protect themselves by never leaving a drink unattended and avoiding drinking from punch bowls or common containers, the officers said.

“Date rape drugs can be found in different forms such as liquid, powder or pill form. They can also be hidden in small containers such as eye drop bottles, gum or breath mint packs,” Rivard said in information handed out to the audience.

The women’s self protection and awareness course was provided in cooperation with the Goffstown Adult Education program. Rivard said he expects to conduct further sessions in the spring.